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Corrupt a wish!

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GopherBlaine's picture
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EA17 - Well, you messed that up.

JoeyFogey wrote:
I wish my air conditioner worked.

Granted, but in order to get it to work, you have to power it by AA batteries, which ends up costing you more to cool your home than you bring in per week.

I wish that I had an original Indian motorcycle in pristine condition.

The Templars were framed.

161803398874989's picture
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I wish that I had an original Indian motorcycle in pristine condition.

Granted, but the moment you get, a group of thugs enters your house and destroys the motorcycle.

I wish my sons were half as brave as you. Tongue

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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Granted, but they're now twice as stupid Tongue

I wish John Belushi was still alive...

Live by the creed, die by the creed!
Pussy, money, weed, that's all a n*gga need!

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Granted, but he really hates you.

I wish my internet became faster!

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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161803398874989 wrote:
Granted, but he really hates you.

I wish my internet became faster!

Granted, but it becomes so fast that it causes your internet provider's servers to crash and they refuse to provide you any more service, then you are blacklisted and have to rely on dial-up for the rest of your life.

I wish that The Old Republic's Collectors Edition was a reasonable price , and that I got a copy of the game at such reasonable cost, and got to play the game for the entire duration of its time as a wonderful game (in my opinion), being at least one year.

--See what I did there, I extended my wish to make it harder to corrupt. Tongue

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Granted but its your last year to live, you die after... being poisoned after touching the poison... that was laced onto the case of the game.

I wish i had a hat... that comes alive and eats people that obeys me and only me and would never attack me.

well...

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Granted, but when you're on the toilet it eats everyone in the world and you're left to die alone.

I wish I could fly at will, with full control over my flight.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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Granted, but you must eat newborn kittens once a day to sustain the ability. That shouldn't be much of a change for you. Wink

I wish I could move to Hawaii. Holly's sister tells me there are tons of illustrator jobs there. Hm? Oh yeah, stab is there, too, but that doesn't matter.

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Well, not much of a corruption there, Joey. Tongue

Granted, but it turns out that stab being there does matter, because you're at once overwhelmed by the gigantic size of his knowledge and die a horrible, slow, agonizing death.

I wish I was really good at making music with a music program (instruments and I get along great) and that I could keep my senses while at it. Smile

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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Granted but your computer gets a virus. its shot.

I wish i had a shiny penny.

well...

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AssassinGuy23 wrote:
Granted but your computer gets a virus. its shot.

I wish i had a shiny penny.

Granted. This penny is so shiny that it is seen in space by a spy satellite. The people watching the satellite footage believe it to be the glare of a super laser that they had been secretly devising. They panic, wondering how someone else has their super-weapon of doom, and you are swarmed by secret agents before the day is out. They proceed to torture you for a month without end asking where you hid the laser. When they finally believe you at the end of the month, they realize you have learned too much about the weapon from their questions. You are left to rot in a prison that officially does not exist under a volcano somewhere until you die from dehydration.

I wish that I could learn the absolute and unpolluted truth about anything I wonder about, when I wish to learn it, and instantly learn so.

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Granted, but then you die.

Also, AG, that's a bit difficult. I'm on a UNIX-based OS. Tongue

I wish I had infinite money and the capability to use it for whatever I wanted.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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Granted, but while swimming in the sea of of your endless cash on your first day of gaining it, you suffocate and die.

We're getting more dull with the wish-granting.

I wish I could start working right away when I sit at my cubicle every morning and not have to divert my attention to yahoo news to get my brain to process.

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Granted, but you stop looking at the news altogether, concentrating only on work. As a result you become detached from current events society and are outcast by those around you.

I wish J.K. Rowling would write more Harry Potter books that are equally as good as the rest...

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Granted, but somehow you have lost all capability to read.

I wish I could do 100 decline pushups, 100 jump squats, 10 minutes plank, 100 lunges and 100 dead weight pull ups right now.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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granted but your muscels are overused and now you can´t use them permanently Big smile

i wish i had ac revelations now full game

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Granted but it's absolutely terrible and you want to kill yourself because of it.

I wish I didn't have to go to work tomorrow.

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granted but everyone at work get´s a bonus

i wan´t a new xbox

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Granted, but as soon as you turn it on, it has the red ring of death and there's no warranty to return it. Mwahahahahaha

I wish my wishes couldn't be corrupted.

PSN: JoeyFogey

Steam: JoeyFogey

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Granted, from now on your wishes can't be corrupted. Except you DIE.

JUSTICE

I wish I could have new awesome games and the capability to play them.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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Granted, except they have a mind of their own and are sick and tired of being played. You are pulled into the game world and enslaved as a pesky bard in AC2. Ezio then appears and remembers what you said about pesky bards:

161803398874989 wrote:
I always wait for them to finish a song or two then throw then a few florins. I like them, they are really nice. Smile

Not really, I always punch them in the face.

Ezio: "Hmmmmmm..." *strikes fists together*

POETIC JUSTICE
I wish to put an end to all corruption. Smile

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Granted you become corrupted while doing it.

I wish it was October already.

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Granted, but some seriously awesome stuff was going to happen in August.

I wish nothing.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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granted but you end up in an oblivion and get bored to dead

i wish for 1200 microsoft points

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Granted, but everything on XBL Marketplace is priced up to 1201 Microsoft Points.

I wish there was something decent to eat in my house!

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Granted, but every decent food item you touch becomes spoiled.

I wish I had my own place.

PSN: JoeyFogey

Steam: JoeyFogey

Instagram: thatsketchyhero

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Granted, but it's a carton box.

I wish I infinite valid money.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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granted but you get arrested because the police think it´s fake

i wish for a nice new t shirt

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granted but it gives you a rash on your chest

i wish live was like dbz

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which

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granted but yor just a citizen in east city so you die like 20 times Big smile

i wish i could have cool hair like goku

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granted but you would be attacked by aliens every day Tongue

i wish the world was'nt corrupted like it is

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which

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Granted, but for that to happen, the world has to explode.

I wish for the next poster to become extremely awesome, without this wish affecting me in any way whatsoever.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

davinci9's picture
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yeah but you get an hart attack suddenly and die Big smile

i wish that there would be new dragon ball episodes but that their are good

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granted but its 2 sagas long

i wish ubisoft takes my idea and makes an assassins creed anime !!!

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which

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They do, but it's absolute shit.
Oh, wait. Not much of a corruption there. Meh. I'll take it.

I wish my downloads weren't so slow.

_________________

"Betraying the Assassins is never good for one's health."
"Well, neither is drinking liquor, but I'm drawn to its dangers all the same."

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wish granted but a download puts a virus on your computer

i wish i had all the skills an ultimate assassin has

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which

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EzioAltair17 wrote:
wish granted but a download puts a virus on your computer

i wish i had all the skills an ultimate assassin has

So, you immediately put them to use and kill some random hobo. Only you don't have patience (its a virtue, not a skill). You kill this poor random hobo right in front of a police station. Shortly afterwards, you learn that no assassin has enough skill to dodge bullets.

I wish to have an enormous library of books on topics that I find interesting, in a format that I can read no matter if I go blind and/or deaf and/or unable to read braille and this format also makes the books accessible from anywhere for me, wihtout the possibility of them being destroyed.

Try to corrupt that, HA!!! (Should be interesting, I hope)

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Granted, but you become mentally retarded. F*ck you, I corrupted the sh*t out of that motherf*ckin' wish, cracka!

I wish I could sleep more every night. Need more hours in a day!

PSN: JoeyFogey

Steam: JoeyFogey

Instagram: thatsketchyhero

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granted you would over sleep lol

i wish i had batman arkham city now !!

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which

davinci9's picture
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granted but the game isn´t complete and so it´s suck and you kill yourself

i wish i could´t fly like goku

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Granted, but you fly into a plane turbine your first try.

I wish I didn't have to buy a whole new A/C unit for my house. I hate this heat wave. -_-

PSN: JoeyFogey

Steam: JoeyFogey

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granted you don´t buy it and it is now very hot

i wish for a new lap top

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Granted, but it's MY old one! MWAHAHAHAHA! (it's the worst laptop ever made)

I wish MY laptop would arrive a week early and nothing bad happen to it or myself.

PSN: JoeyFogey

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no but your house is set on fire
how could your laptop be worse mine is slow and the half of the keys to make a good sentence are not working
i wish that i would get the laptop that i saw in the store it was a nice one

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Granted, but it was just a model laptop, not a working one.

And mine is worse because: it takes 10 minutes to get to the desktop, it overheats in 2 of those minutes, many keys do not work, it's covered in dust, it was made in 2001, the PLASTIC covering on everything is worn and falling off, it had a virus when I first turned it on and connected the wifi, the wifi doesn't work more than 20 feet away from the router, etc.

I wish I could castrate 2 specific people on my mind right now (a few THB members know why).

PSN: JoeyFogey

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granted but for each one you do, you lose one testicle.

I wish this game would end...

well...

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granted but i keep it going

i wish i was immortal

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which

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EzioAltair17 wrote:
granted but i keep it going

i wish i was immortal

Granted. But, you are frozen in an iceberg for a decade, thus you lose your limbs to frostbite. Scientists recover your body and begin dissecting you without anesthesia to determine why you still live. These probes continue for years on end as they cannot determine the cause of your immortality, and you cannot protest because you lost your vocal chords and lungs along the way. In the end you are relegated to periodic probing and sitting on a pedestal in an empty room the rest of the time, where you slowly go stir-crazy. However you can't do anything because you are immortal and limb-less...

I wish for more smileys in the selection for this forum!!!

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granted but you get kicked because you used an bad smiley Evil

i wish for world peace no i wish for ........................eh a new big tv and it works good

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granted it gets stolen

i wish harley qinn was my b*tch

To be fair, you have to have a very high IQ to understand Rick and Morty. The humor is extremely subtle, and without a solid grasp of theoretical physics most of the jokes will go over a typical viewer's head. There's also Rick's nihilistic outlook, which